The Humor Thread


 
There's a lot of raptors & baldies around here. I'm pretty sure I heard coyotes yipping a few nights, very very late. There's a reason that our furballs are purely indoor furballs. My brother, due east of here over in MI, likes to see coyotes, foxes & other small predators to keep the rabbit & vermin populations down in the orchards.
 
Rich G said:
Yes, yes I would! ....and just to complete the look, I'd tuck a #2 pencil behind my ear. You think someone could sew on some patches that look like those MAD cartoon stickers that I used to plaster all over my Pee Chee folders?? :)
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You're showing your age Rich. :p
I haven't heard or thought about Pee Chee folders in several decades, maybe longer.
 
JKalchik said:
There's a lot of raptors & baldies around here. I'm pretty sure I heard coyotes yipping a few nights, very very late. There's a reason that our furballs are purely indoor furballs. My brother, due east of here over in MI, likes to see coyotes, foxes & other small predators to keep the rabbit & vermin populations down in the orchards.
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We have coyotes in our neck of Charlotte, which is why my late cat Lard A$$ came in at night whether he wanted to or not!
A friend of ours who lives in the next county over said that she saw some coyotes in the field behind her house and was afraid for her dog, who stayed outside during the day
I told her to get a pellet gun and pump the bejeesus out of it and to shoot them in the hind quarters if they got too close! They'd learn sooner or later!!
 
A retired Teamster was attending a barbecue equipment convention in Reno and decided to check out the local "hospitality" houses.

When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union house?"

"No," she replied, "I'm sorry it isn't."

"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"

"The house gets $60 and the girls get $40," she answered.

Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, "Why yes sir, this is a union house. We observe all union rules."

The man asked, "And, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"

"The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."

"That's more like it!" the union man said.

He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive blue-eyed blonde.

"I'd like her," he said.

"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam.

...but the Madam then gestured to a 80 year old woman in the corner, "Nancy here has 40 years seniority and according to union rules, she's next."
 
Phil Perrin said:
We have coyotes in our neck of Charlotte, which is why my late cat Lard A$$ came in at night whether he wanted to or not!
A friend of ours who lives in the next county over said that she saw some coyotes in the field behind her house and was afraid for her dog, who stayed outside during the day
I told her to get a pellet gun and pump the bejeesus out of it and to shoot them in the hind quarters if they got too close! They'd learn sooner or later!!
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We had alot of coyotes last year. We're a couple of miles from the foothills but could hear them yiping & baying outside at night, every night. One night we heard a cat yeowing outside, I opened the front door & found a cat cornered by a young coyote who looked like he didn't know what to do next. Once he saw me, he trotted off. I can't help thinking of cousin Eddie from Christmas vacation talking about a cat using all 9 lives, lol. The coyotes cleared most of the cats out of our neighborhood.
We spent months going out to the backyard with the dogs (1 Beagle & 1 pug mix) so they could go to the bathroom while we watched for coyotes.
 
Brian_D said:
We had alot of coyotes last year. We're a couple of miles from the foothills but could hear them yiping & baying outside at night, every night. One night we heard a cat yeowing outside, I opened the front door & found a cat cornered by a young coyote who looked like he didn't know what to do next. Once he saw me, he trotted off. I can't help thinking of cousin Eddie from Christmas vacation talking about a cat using all 9 lives, lol. The coyotes cleared most of the cats out of our neighborhood.
We spent months going out to the backyard with the dogs (1 Beagle & 1 pug mix) so they could go to the bathroom while we watched for coyotes.
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My BIL in Texarkana lost one of his two dachshunds to a coyote a couple years ago
 
The coyote is a great white shark on land. They'll eat everything from a cricket to an elk. We live in out in the country, and have them all around our house. We have no problem removing them when the opportunity presents itself....
Tim
 
We have coyotes all over the place here. We see them in the day time and night time. I get up about 6am and go out to get the paper and more often than not will see a couple of coyotes walking down the middle of the street.
Whitney our rescue dog is a golden retriever / husky / coyote mix that was running wild on the Navajo Indian reservation in New Mexico before she was caught and brought back to Arizona for adoption. She has the traits of all three, friendliness of the golden, the digging abilities of the husky and the hunting skills of the coyote. At the end of our street it's all open land for miles we go out there and I take her off the leash and she goes into her hunting mode. Nothing is safe from lizards to moles to rabbits if she catches a lizard the retriever in her kicks in and she will bring it back to me, it's hilarious with the lizard tail sticking out of her mouth wiggling back and forth, drops it by my feet and waits for her "good dog" then goes to find another one. Never hurts them they just wonder off again.
If we see coyotes out there she will hang out with me and watch them until their out of site, then back to her hunting mode. Really fun to watch.
 
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