The Humor Thread


 
I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing Retraced my steps, got lost on the way back. Now I have no idea what's going on.

The officer said, "You drinking?" I said, "You buying?" We just laughed and laughed....I need bail money.

I think the reason we are born with two hands is so we can pet two dogs at once.

Day 12 without chocolate. Lost hearing in my left eye.

Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons They forgot to mention morons.
 
I recently spent $6,500 on this registered Black Angus bull.
I put him out with the herd but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow.
I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth.
Anyway......I had the Vet come and take a look at him.
He said, the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.
The bull started to service the cows within two days……. all my cows!
He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows!
He's like a machine!
I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him ... but they kind of taste like peppermint.
 

 

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