National Kitchen Klutzes of America Day


 
I was going to post this earlier but didn't think it qualified either. DH did this tho. He put salt instead of sugar in my coffee and one time put sugar in his cup instead of mine.
 
Seriously? You must be a gustatory/culinary genius, we should all bow to the magnificence.
That’s on him, pretty minor foible. You know there’s one that’s still making you go, “I should have known better!”
Again, you started this.
 
I will take this opportunity to publicly apologize to you Joan. Your PM made me realize I may have been a bit intimidating, it was all meant in good sporting fun.
No harm intended.
 
I would give anything if I was able to be back in my kitchen, even if I was a klutze. I am sure in my many, many years in the kitchen, I screwed up, I just wish I could remember those days.
 
Most recent..three days ago, I was prepping some half slices of bacon for bacon burgers and the rest of the pound as lardons for a “pork bomb” and, I neede to respond to an email, I walked away the next sound was... you guessed it, “Bacon Alarm”!
This is the most sensitive “Bacon Alarm” I’ve ever had to pull off the wall in my life! Breakfast bacon I bake, slowly. Bacon that will be rolled into a bomb, I generally fry. Alarm seems to not care one whit about methodology,it just goes off about three minutes before any timer I set!
Getting old ain’t for the faint of heart!
 
About two hours ago I turned on my baby Blackstone and walked away. Two minutes later I went back to it and realized it wasn't lit. I turned the gas off(I couldn't smell any gas), waited a minute, blew under it a couple times and figured it was fine. Then I re-lit it. I'm lucky I still have my eyebrows. My wife came out and asked "what was that noise?". Nothing honey!
 
Flip that, D-I-L swapped out tanks. Forgot to shut valves off before trying to light. I shut it all down, broke the connections, re connected and one tweak of a lighter (I have not replaced the igniter yet) nice, perfectly sized blue flames! Learned that from you “gasbags” here, with the greatest respect!
I’m reminded of an old Chet Atkins statement from an “Austin City Limits” show, “See? Come to these hillbilly shows, you might learn something!” RIP Chet! It was a shared show with the late great Merle Travis, maybe the best ACL
Ever recorded!
 
My Dad gave me some yellow banana peppers from his garden to take home since I really liked them. They were medium heat and sweet. By the time I got around to cutting them up to pickle them they had turned red and didn’t realize how much that Increased the heat until I had to urinate.
That was years ago but I remember it like it was yesterday.
 
Ok, I'll fess up.
Took 4 rib-eyes off the grill to take into the house. Tripped on a coping stone & proceded to throw all four steaks into the flower weed bed, along with myself. There was alcohol involved. Quickly retrieved them, took them into the outside wash-house to rinse the dirt off. Back on the grill for a minute of re-heat. Luckily for me the sun was already over the yardarm, and guests were inside the house "one-sheet-to-the-wind" themselves, oblivious to the Keystone Cop scenario unfolding outside. Phew!, nobody saw me. And to this day nobody is any the wiser, and there were no complaints about the "char" either. Win/win.
Remember: What happens on TVWBB stays on TVWBB.
 
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My lovely wife and I cook together occasionally. She's the love of my life, but has the subtle nature of a freight train (and she knows it). In the kitchen, she tends to whirl about while holding hot pans, and sharp knives. We have a smallish galley style kitchen so giving her a wide berth isn't always easy. I took a broadside to the forearm with a hot frying pan a few years ago and a solid 2nd degree burn, so giving her the wide berth has become a solid habit of mine. She felt so bad about it, and we joke about it once in a while so she's a little more cognizant on potential injury to her DH on "cook together night".
 
Rich Dahl said:
Got up early to smoke a pork butt. Fired up the WSM hooked up my trusty maverick and took it out in the garage with me to monitor the cook. When the WSM stabilized I went in to get the butt and the phone rang, It was just a spam call so I hung up and went back out to the garage. Almost three hours later I wondered why the temp on the butt hadn't changed from 85 degrees. I went out to check and here's the meat probe just hanging in the wind. I thought I just forgot to put it into the butt. The look on my face must have been priceless when I lifted the lid and no butt.
It was still in the fridge. Needless to say dinner was a little late that day.
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This wins, in my opinion! :LOL: I could see myself doing this, then standing there wondering who stole my pork butt!
 
should I talk about the time I was smoking some beautiful wild salmon fillets and bumped the temp up just a bit to finish them, lost track of time and when I check them I had made about $50 dollars worth of salmon charcoal......

or time we had a big party I was cooking for and was transitioning from a Cajun boil to deep frying chicken wings in the same aluminum turkey fryer pot, put the pot on the flame while I prepped the wings to make sure I had all the water out of the pot.......a friend said 'ummmmm Brett, is it supposed to do that?'.......the aluminum pot was melting making cute little burn holes in my wood deck......

or that time at band camp...................
 
Wow, that’s a bad one Brett, I’ve come close to that but, not a complete pot meltdown. I think that might be game, set maybe even match!
 
Brett_Roundy said:
should I talk about the time I was smoking some beautiful wild salmon fillets and bumped the temp up just a bit to finish them, lost track of time and when I check them I had made about $50 dollars worth of salmon charcoal......

or time we had a big party I was cooking for and was transitioning from a Cajun boil to deep frying chicken wings in the same aluminum turkey fryer pot, put the pot on the flame while I prepped the wings to make sure I had all the water out of the pot.......a friend said 'ummmmm Brett, is it supposed to do that?'.......the aluminum pot was melting making cute little burn holes in my wood deck......

or that time at band camp...................
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you had to bring up band camp....:geek:
 
Last year I was baking a pie to take over to a friends house for dinner. It was in a glass dish sitting on a metal pan to catch the drippings. Proceeded to take it out of the oven and the pie slid off the pan and hit the back of the oven making a mess in the oven.

After a few minutes of panic and anger at myself I was able to salvage it. Tasted good. Presentation, not so much.
 
PHolder said:
Last year I was baking a pie to take over to a friends house for dinner. It was in a glass dish sitting on a metal pan to catch the drippings. Proceeded to take it out of the oven and the pie slid off the pan and hit the back of the oven making a mess in the oven.

After a few minutes of panic and anger at myself I was able to salvage it. Tasted good. Presentation, not so much.
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presentation is highly over rated...........,.
 
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