Dave--
This Friday--tomorrow--in Okeechobee. Party of 35. If my estimates are correct it's likely to come in at $22.85pp--a savings for you of $1.15! A RT ticket to Orlando (a slight additional expense) would put you 110 miles from the party! (I'll send a car to get you.)
Dale--
I would love to write a book. And I'd be happy to help with sides. Let me know what you're after.
**************************
Commentary:
There are people everywhere who will pay for quality but it is quite true that there are many who will jump in an underbid you if given the opportunity. This is only possible though if one compares apples to apples, not apples to oranges (or in my case pomegranates or calamondins or Surinam cherries). In other words, I set myself apart and do not compete on price nor do I negotiate fees. I can work within a budget if there is one but this needs to start in the $22-25/pp range (it is higher, usually, for small groups because of the time involved). This figure includes apps and the main meal but does not include beverages, dessert(s) or any services items (plates, utensils). I'll detail this more for those who might be interested somewhere downthread. The upshot: What I try to do is offer food as an experience, not simply food to feed
x amount of people. 80% of the time we don't even discuss the food ahead of time. We discuss the nature of the party (celebration, get-together, event; casual or not; lunch, dinner, cocktail party, other; age range of guests; time of day), the number of guests and that's about it. I do whatever I want. 10% of the time we might discuss the main dish (only) in a little detail, and I make all the other decisions, and 10% of the time we discuss everything in much greater detail but I always leave myself wiggle room where it counts and/or make part of the discussion revolve around options so that I am not locked into every single aspect having to be just so.
This approach makes me
not an 'apple' so it doesn't invite comparisons on that level. Though certainly I and my food can be compared to others and their food it is on other levels and it is more of an emotional or intellectual exercise and this distinguishes me and other higher end chefs from the pack, so to speak.
This brings up another point: Distinguish yourself. People don't refer to me as a caterer. I refer to myself in conversation as a private chef (my business card says 'itinerant chef') simply because I went from the commercial arena of restaurant kitchens to private work and never thought to call myself anything different; I had been 'Chef' for some time. Because I refer to myself that way others refer to me that way and it sets me apart in a way that, apparently, works for me. Nothing at all negative about the word caterer of course, but I'll take the distinction, any distinction thank you very much, wherever I can.
I am not of the give-them-what-they-want school of thought and this is distinguishing. There is nothing wrong with that approach but that's not what I do. I do not have a menu of items from which to choose, preferring to create the food based upon the type of occasion and what I think will fly and what I think will be memorable. I make the food accessible though, nothing so out there that people are afraid to eat it. For my own sanity, I do not combine many difficult items for a meal but I do make things with complexity, at least some things, and I do make things that look difficult even though they aren't terribly so. I want the hosts and guests to look at the food and think 'Wow' and I want them to taste it and think 'Wow' and I want to leave the impression that no one else but me would have come up with this menu and no one else but me
could come up with it, could cook it. This certainly isn't necessarily so but that's the reaction I shoot for and it is how people remember me.
I don't compete (and I don't always do barbecue for parties--a bit better than half the time I do) so I do not have the ability to use this to my advantage; I cannot say 'award-winning' this or that. Others can use this as one of their distinguishing marks. Jim Minion has a successful catering biz in the Seattle area, Konrad east of there, and both have the props and the media to use to their advantage and both make good use of it. For them this is but one of their distinguishing marks. Get all you can; set yourself apart.
An aside on the personal criticism front: Whenever you cook, be it for your family, friends, or a gig, naturally you will be self-critical and this is fine. Do not under any circumstances verbalize your thoughts to those present. If you have a confidant--your wife, cooking partner, whoever--discuss it with them when prudent, but out of earshot of others, and preferably well after the event is done and you are back home or otherwise by yourselves, later. Do not let your face betray your thoughts if you are not happy with something during the event/meal. (If you are
really not happy with something, if something is totally off, do not serve it. Apologize for whatever it is not working out and move on.) Attitude, as others have noted upthread, is very important. It is another quality one brings to the game, so to speak, and one must carry that attitude throughout. Self-criticize later. Allow your client and their guests (or your friends and family) to enjoy your food unmolested by even slightly negative commentary. Finesse any issues. Hold your head high. Look the part.
I am running a bit behind on my food flow front at the moment. At some point in the next few days I'll detail this party I'm doing, the fees and flow and why I made some of the choices I made in case anyone is interested and can use any of the info to help themselves. There are many ways to approach the business and many avenues to success. If anything I do or any way I do something can be helpful to someone else I'm will to share it in as much detail is required. Just ask.
***********
Steve--
I hopeyou tried the piroshki when you were at Pike Place--some of the best! And so true: There are many elements that make a meal special.