Ah, see, the key is in leaving the paper OUTSIDE, in the same tightly-closed Rubbermaid tub the charcoal, chimney, tongs, grill brush, gloves, etc. live in. Put in one weekday edition of the Globe at the start of the season and that'll last you through the summer, but being out there means the paper turns nice and dry. (It's not enough paper to start a fire even if by some fluke a stray cinder got in there, and besides, it's isolated on a concrete patio well away from the house.) Two sheets of of this well-aged newspaper goes up like anything just by touching it with the lighter in a couple spots on the grill (and trust me, it STAYS lit), and I genuinely do have charcoal smoke and flame within 90 seconds using this technique. Generally, my coals are ready to go in about 15-20 minutes when I'm using lump and 20-25 if I'm using briquettes, and that countdown starts the second the tip of the firestick hits the paper.
In my experience, the only time you have trouble keeping the newspaper lit is if you're (1) using that day's paper (which was impregnated with ink less than 24 hours ago -- pull an older paper out of the recycle bin and it'll be drier) or (2) cramming too much paper up in there and choking off the oxygen. If you're still having problems, spray the sheets with a little Pam before you wad 'em up: that'll be more than enough accelerant, but if you're doing it right, you don't even need that.
