The Humor Thread

[LMichaels]

You're killin me here

[Clint]

[Lynn Dollar]

[Joan]

Ha Ha, so true, so true!!! That is what I keep telling my DH.

[Bob Correll]

\\

[Clint]

[LMichaels]

I am sure a few of us can relate

[Rich Dahl]

I am sure a few of us can relate

Yeah my doctor just changed my cholesterol medicine. I had to change my last name to Gasman. But it's not all bad....I can get even with the dogs now.

[Rusty James]

The following are actual transcription notes taken out of people's charts. What do you think the doctor meant?

• The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1994.
• The patient has no past history of suicides.
• The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
• Discharge Status: Alive but without permission.
• The patient refused an autopsy.
• She is numb from her toes down.
• While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
• On the second day, the knee was better and on the third day, it had completely disappeared.
• Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
• The patient was to have a bowel resection, however he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
• Bleeding started in the rectal area, and continued all the way to Los Angeles.
• The patient lives at home with his mother, father and pet turtle who is presently enrolled in daycare 3 times a week.
• Rectal exam revealed a normal sized thyroid.
• The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut and handed to the pediatrician who breathed and cried immediately.
• The lab test indicated abnormal lover function

[Joan]

The following are actual transcription notes taken out of people's charts. What do you think the doctor meant?

• The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1994.
• The patient has no past history of suicides.
• The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
• Discharge Status: Alive but without permission.
• The patient refused an autopsy.
• She is numb from her toes down.
• While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
• On the second day, the knee was better and on the third day, it had completely disappeared.
• Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
• The patient was to have a bowel resection, however he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
• Bleeding started in the rectal area, and continued all the way to Los Angeles.
• The patient lives at home with his mother, father and pet turtle who is presently enrolled in daycare 3 times a week.
• Rectal exam revealed a normal sized thyroid.
• The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut and handed to the pediatrician who breathed and cried immediately.
• The lab test indicated abnormal lover function

Rusty, thank you so much for posting this. It is sooo hilarious !!!!!